I have been facilitating study groups on Ethics for the New Millennium with inmates in the medium security prison in Maine now for about a year and I am always humbled and amazed by the kind of response I am witness to there. Whether it is men or women, young folks or older, so-called hardened criminals or newly incarcerated, the guidelines that the Dalai Lama puts forth for how to be an ethical member of society seem to be heard and felt differently than the way any religious dogma, societal laws or parental guidelines are received. Even though all these may be essentially saying the same things: do unto others, behave compassionately, live by the golden rule, etc, there is something clearer and cleaner about the message that comes from his way of thinking and communicating. They get it.
We always start the very first class discussing what I consider to be the basic premise of ethics studied from the standpoint of Buddhism and the Dalai Lama’s understanding of ethics. I ask them, “Can we all accept as true that all beings want to be happy and all beings want to avoid suffering?” We give some thought to this statement. Usually there is one or two who nod their heads immediately in agreement. Then there are always a few who say, “No, not everyone wants to be happy.” I ask them what they mean. “There are people who just want to be unhappy and make others unhappy…they are just mean people.”
OK, let’s think about that, I say. Do you think that they started out as little children wanting to hurt others, wanting to be unhappy and mean? Well, no, they answer, but they turn into that. How? Who knows it just happens…or bad parenting, poverty, etc. So, can we unequivocally say that they don’t want to be happy? More thought. Is it possible, I ask, that underneath all their misguided, mistaken behavior, which is wrong-minded and confused, that they still want to be happy, they just don’t know how”
Most in the room will agree that it is possible. Then I ask whether when they themselves behaved in ways that have gotten them into this prison let’s say, were they thinking and acting out of their ‘right minds’? No, lots of agreement there. So, can we all agree that most of what we do comes from a place of wanting to be happy, and wanting to avoid suffering, even if we are robbing a bank, or selling drugs or even physically hurting someone else? At the time of any of these actions we were probably thinking I am just going to do this because I need to in order to get what I want, and to be happy (whatever our definition of happiness happens to be at that time). Sounds simplistic and it is.
More agreement. Then, invariably there will be a discussion of the kind of person who could be considered a psychopath. Here, we are talking about a person who is clearly not in their ‘right mind’ and therefore they are outside of the purview of our little survey.
Gradually, with a fair amount of allowing for all opinions, and without judgment of them, we come to a consensus about the ground of basic goodness that we all start from. Once we have arrived at this consensus we have the foundation for the rest of everything we will talk about in the class.
For many in prison, because of the kinds of background and experience they have had, this may be the first time they are hearing that they too are good, fundamentally good. That we are all good, no matter what we have done. The obscuring of that goodness is in fact temporary and can be fixed, healed and counteracted.
This truly is a different sort of concept! It is different than original sin, than doing bad and being bad, from lucky or unlucky, from God loves you no matter what you have done. It is not a reprieve from something; it can never be won or taken away. Our basic goodness is always there, no matter what and it cannot be sullied or stained. Even if it is covered over, like the sky with clouds, it can never be altered, just as the clouds never alter the sky.
In Buddhist thought “goodness” is not a moral term. Instead it points to what is fundamental about us, and the purity inherent in all experience. Yes, even the rotten, unkind, criminal kind. This is mind-blowing for almost all who begin to absorb this. Whatever our situation, our confusion, our resources or psychological state, basically nothing can threaten our richness or dignity.
Our being is good because it is not a fundamental source of aggression or ‘badness’. Basic goodness is what we have, what we are provided with, our inheritance. And when basic goodness is covered by confusion of thought, word or deed, it is still there, unstained and unsullied.
In this premise there is profound relaxation. We can relax, we can let go of our judgments about ourselves and about others. We make mistakes, we get confused, we really mess up, but it is just like the clouds covering the sun. When this really sinks in it changes us, it dramatically changes our relationship to the world and to each other. We are all just doing the best we can do at the moment, given the understanding we have. And every moment is a fresh moment.
And because we are all in the same boat it is basically a non-dual teaching, one that profoundly relaxes our tendency to judge and feel judged. This is not an “us/them” kind of teaching…it is an understanding that if it goes for one, it goes for all. No exceptions.
This basic goodness is reflected in my teaching partner and I to the best of our ability and because we can embody it and reflect it we get amazing results from our groups. More later…
